Thursday, June 5, 2008

No Answers

I am sure some of you are wondering – are we coming home and how is Scott’s work.
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Well there is no answer to us coming home and Scott’s work is struggling.
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Here are my thoughts today. Warning: This is just me feeling out loud.
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I understand that we are to have faith and trust that we are here for a purpose, a purpose that God has put here for us. Today I am feeling so sad and frustrated, because I feel that this purpose is not clear yet – even after almost a year. I have seen Scott and Nkhensani work so hard to get this brick business up and going - Meetings after meetings, testing of blocks, finding a block yard, finding a different block yard, trying to get something in motion. Today I feel they have worked so hard and are no further along in the goal they set out to do (as people would say here – Welcome to South Africa). I am so sad. I feel like we are in God’s waiting line. We pulled the number 543 and God is on number 92. He hears our prayers of frustration, questions, demands, but am I missing the point? I need to have faith that God is in control and we are to Let Go and Let God! I am struggling with this one today. I see what plans I (Scott, ICT) have, but I know our plans are not his plans. God has a purpose for us here, we just can’t see it yet and maybe we never will. The uncertainty that we may be coming home soon is hard for me. I want an answer – selfish isn’t it?
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As of today there is no answer to the question are we coming home. Scott and Nkhensani continue to work hard despite many let downs and frustrations. Innotec is doing the best they can in encouraging and coaching Scott and I see Scott and Nkhensani still aiming high and working towards the goal. I pray that whatever is to happen happens soon. I am trying to be the most supportive wife I can be. It is hard; because like most, I like instant gratification –show me, tell me now!! I think today my faith and trust are being tested! I talked to my Dad today and he reminded me that Satan loves all this frustration and commotion! I am not going to let him move in.
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For I know the plans I have for you says the Lord ……. Whatever the plans are – staying here or going home - I am ok with. I am just missing home and pray so hard that Scott will have a break through or a clear answer to this business. Nothing is sadder than watching someone you love so dearly struggle.
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So I guess the real answer is not that there are NO ANSWERS - It really is God hasn’t answered us yet. And knowing that he is here with us in all the frustrations and uncertainty – I am ok to wait for the answer (when he reaches number 543 :)).
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Please continue to pray for Scott and Nkhensani as they have meetings this week and as decisions are being made. Pray for our family as the not knowing what is happening is hard on us.
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I thank God for this time together as a family, for all the experiences, the growing in the kids and Scott, and the definite growth in me. God is good and he has blessed me/us so much!
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We miss everyone and we will keep you updated.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I implore you not to give in to despair.It is a dangerous tempation,because our Adversary has refined it to the point thatit is quite subtle.Hopelessness constricts and whithers the heart,rendering it unable to sense God's blessings and grace.It also causes us to exaggerate the adversities of life and makes our burdens seem too heavy for us to bear. Yet God's plans for us,and His ways of bringing about His plans, are infinitely wise! (Madame Guyon) Love ya! Dad

Anonymous said...

Praying for you!!! Keep the faith...keep the trust...his plan will come....

Love you tons!!!!

Anonymous said...

Lia, Lia keep looking up! Look at all the good things that you have experienced while in SA, that would not have happened in the USA. God has used you, grown you and I know He's not done with you guys yet! Whether it is in SA or in the USA, God will continue to stretch and grow you. You now know what it is like to live in a foreign country and how blessed we are to be in the USA. How we take for granted all the things that so many others never have or dream of having. I just marvel in how you've grown and to get you to be part of the Zambia team was so great! Thanks for all you do for GEMS, a half a world away! We'll be praying for answers, and in His time they will come. Blessings to you all. Love, Barb

denise said...

Satan thrives on our discouragement, especially when we are doing the Lord's work. You know in your heart that you are right where He wants you to be and you need to dwell on all the good that's taken place. I love your honesty - It's good to talk out loud about how you're feeling.
Know that you are loved and prayed for and everything will work out according to God's plan for you. I don't know of anyone who works harder or is more conscientious than Scott. Good will come of all his labor. Love you all, Mom